Monthly Archives: September 2016

Dating, Romance, Love and Marriage

“Where would we all be without romance?” Almost anyone may say.

“Romance is the spice of life,” goes another one that seems quite accurate.

“Love is a many-splendored thing it’s the April rose that only blooms in the early spring..” so goes a song by Frank Sinatra and adopted as a theme song by almost any romantic love couple from the 1940’s onwards.

However, the great William Shakespeare has this to say, “Men have died and worms have eaten them… but not for love.”

“Romantic love is an illusion. Most of us discover this truth at the end of a love affair or else when the sweet emotions of love lead us into marriage and then turn down their flames.” enthused Thomas Moore in a cynic mood about romance, love and marriage.

Such a lot of effort and ink has been drained in writing about various emotions and feelings involving dating, romance, love and marriage. Many daydream happily and contentedly because of these and many also cried.

Courtship, love and marriage are universal concepts. These concepts exist on people’s culture, animals and plants, even in our imagined extraterrestrials, practically everything that live and breathe. They are integral part of our culture.

In a society, the basic unit is the family. What will a family be without a marriage of two individuals? How will two individuals marry if there is no romance and love? How will two individuals find romance and love if they do not go out to date, be with each other and learn more about each other?

It is truly a chain of concepts. One does not exist without the other. There are all sorts of scientific, Christian, chemical, biological, and etc. views that explains and expands about them. They can be subjective or objective. They can be an issue of religion and an issue of modern science.

The main fact is they exist and they have been in fashion as long as everyone of us can remember. These concepts have been in fashion ever since the oldest human on earth in the Guinness Book of Records was born.

With regards to how these concepts come to exist. There are various warring notions about these. Popular Christian belief is that God loves us that is why He made a way for people to feel love because the powerful feelings of love will be the one to wash away the mortal sins of the people. Love will ultimately be the one to bring peace.

Dating, romance and marriage all have their versions in the Holy Bible. Would you remember the love stories in the Bible? Even if people have different cultures and customs, Christian people always have believed in love.

Meanwhile, the Greek and Roman mythologies also have their versions about dating, romance, love and marriage that until now affect the modern people.

Scientifically, if you would follow Darwin’s Theory of Evolution, we will find that the basis of why the universe and all the things that exist in it is because of nature.

With regards to practices, there are many spanning from ancient times until now.
During the ancient times, most of the marriages were through capture and not by choice.

Meanwhile, the arranged marriages and forced love came up when people began business relationships, borne out of the need for money, property, or political alliances.

The Medieval and Victorian eras saw the birth of romantic concepts as a big factor in love and marriage. These eras were also the birth of the dating activities when men would wine and dine the women. “Medieval Chivalry” and “Victorian Formality” were among the famous terms that would best describe these periods.

Along these periods were also the birth of customs, beliefs and popular inclination about people regarding dating, romance, love and marriage. For example, men are the ones who should be entertaining the women and not the other way around during dates.

Eventually, especially in patriarchal cultures, men are the dominant ones. Women are regarded helpless and dependent. Especially during the Victorian era, men were knights in shining armors and women are the damsels in distress. Women are more romantic and prone to loving too much. Men are more reasonable and must be dependable.

The concepts about sex and procreation also came into play along with romance and love.

Nowadays with the diversity in culture and the significant changes in the society, it is but understandable that the views on dating, romance, love and marriage have changed largely.